Time Machine

I wish I could go back to Jan. 2007. Before me and you. Before you were my best friend. Before we were us. I cry myself to sleep as you sleep peacefully. I am constantly in a state of distress, Im a mess, you reject, your infidelity. I sit and cry, dont know why, I keep trying to pull through. When deep in my heart I know I should start to run away from you. But I remain, things don't change, stay the same, on the brain, is the name of betrayal. And I walk as I talk and I say, no way as I silently pray you will find a way to come back to me. You sit back and relax like a track on the mac and spit lyrics I have heard before. But like my favorite song Itune in and cry, as slowly more of me dies, inside, and my pride is aside along with my dignity. Are you even feeling me? Damn, can you possibly be that man I cant stand but whose hand I hold at night when Im sleeping? Will you ever claim me to be more than what other people see? Your friend, the pretend, has no end, I cant bend backwards any further. My tears and the glass, hurt me fast, but pain doesnt last, I am numb. I just want the conversations to cease, please stop and release the venom in you. You are poisoning me and you lack sympathy, who do you want me to be? Do I need to be her? What will the dark and this time apart that is hurting this weak heart of mine bring? Will the spring bring the end of the friends or the trends of defending my heart? Or will I sit here holding on for dear life, I just might, not survive to reply

to these questions....